Friday, October 7, 2016

I Remember Her

I downloaded the new Ingrid Michaelson album the other day.  I had actually pre-ordered it, I love her so much.  I know I'm going to love anything she puts out.

As is my bad habit upon first waking in the morning, I grabbed my phone to look at emails and texts that came in since I had gone to bed the night before.  I ignored any and all other messages when I read the email that Ingrid's CD was ready for download. Obviously, that took priority!

Fermin was still asleep beside me, so I was listening to the CD quietly on my phone.  The second this song started, "I Remember Her" I felt emotional.  Almost trembling. I didn't even know the title, or anything about the song. By the time Ingrid sang her chorus... I was crying.  And although I was trying to be quite, I guess my stirring (and sniffling) woke Fermin up.  He asked me what was wrong and I said, "Just - this song...."

He didn't ask me anything about it.  Or interupt my moment.  And that's the best thing he could have done.  I just laid there in bed and listened to the song a few times- thinking of Mom and missing her so much.  I don't often cry over my missing her these days... but occasionally something hits me.  And it HITS me. But I don't mind the deep painful feeling of missing her.  I like knowing that I can still feel that close to her that I miss her so terribly.

It's now been 11 years since Mom died.  Wait.  Let me write that again.  Eleven years.  I can't even wrap my head around that.  I was so worried that time would pass, and I might forget subtle little things about her.  But nope.  Not at all.  I remember her. 


I Remember Her by Ingrid Michaelson

There is a house, that's not on a hill
And the paint's chipping off of the old windowsill
There's a tree in the front yard
That's older than me, and older than all of you
There's a smell that the heat makes
It reminds me of Christmas
And birthdays in December

I remember her, I remember her
I remember her so well
I remember her, I remember her
I remember her so well
But things they fade...

She would kiss my hand, she would kiss my head
And she'd fall asleep with me in my tiny bed
She would sing me lullabies
Gave me my hazel eyes
And then she called me beautiful
She made me beautiful

I remember her, I remember her
I remember her so well
I remember her, I remember her
I remember her so well
But things they fade, things turn to grey
As much as I try to save them they turn to grey
Just like the house that's not on a hill
With all of the rust on the gate,
The chips on the sill
But I love it still

1 comment:

Tanya Hauser said...

Kerri! I made the mistake of listening to this for the first time while I was at work. Thanks for sharing.