Wednesday, March 29, 2006

I Am Her Daughter!


I don't have many pictures of my mom and I together. Not many pictures of Mom, period. She never was a fan of having her picture taken because she didn't like how she looked in photos. Something about her "bad eye".

But I think, no, I KNOW if my mom had known how much I LOVE to look at pictures of her now that I can't see her in real life, she would have posed endlessly. My mom was a "giver" and she would've given me anything I might have asked for.

When I see a picture of my mom, I don't see the "bad eye" or anything else that is flawed. I see my mom. And I love this picture in particular, because not only do I see her, but I see my resemblance to her. I don't know if anyone besides me can see it. Maybe I see the physical likeness, because I know how connected we were and are. Like my mom, I love to laugh, and I love the simple little things in life.

My mom's friend, Irene, put it so well when she said, "Joanie was all about the fun". What a cool way to go down in history, I think! That's a pretty good life philosophy I'd like to have as my mantra: "I'm all about the fun".

I hope I possess more and more of my mom's great qualities as I get older. She had a bunch: She was a great friend, a patient listener, someone who loved to help people, and she was "all about the fun"! I also hope I look half as good as she does in this picture once I'm 69!

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

I'm a LOVER...

Just to clarify...Although I have written about some stuff I "Love to Hate", I meant it all lightly. I am NOT a hater. In fact, I used the term very loosely. I got a weird little feeling when I looked at the "burning ?" posts though. I'm not trying to put bad energy out there! Especially not on my site. :)

As of post #6, it seems to have ruffled some feathers. Lordy, Lordy! Not my intention. But, I'm sticking to it- I hope people will just take it how I meant it.

Anyone who knows me, knows I'm not some cynical naysayer. But come on, some things just rub us all the wrong way at times, and it's funny to comment on it some times. I'm not perfect, I don't even want to be.

Anyways, the first burning question has already caused a little controversy. I wasn't really expecting that.

Monday, March 27, 2006

Burning Question

I just posted my first question on the "Burning ?" page on my site. Ever since I started my website, I had wanted a forum, or something where people who visit my site could communicate with each other. I wanted to make it a fun little site to visit. More than once. I visited tons of sites that have "forums". I just don't like that word for some reason. And I think the basic forum format was a little complex for me to deal with, actually.

So I finally decided to pose a question each week, not just a question but a BURNING question, and hope that people will respond to it.

Now, I must admit, I'm feeling nervous. Nervous because don't know if anyone will actually respond. What if I pose different questions week after week, and no one but me responds? And then the secret is out...I am the only person that visits my website. But, I reassure myself, if that is true, no one will even notice that no one is responding. Just me. And I think my questions ARE burning and I want to answer them!!!

So, in other words, I am no further along in the development of my self-confidence as I was in highschool. Ok, 5th grade. I can remember thinking I couldn't wait to be an age when I didn't care so much about what other people thought. I thought that age was somewhere in the 30s. (I have a feeling, at the time I started thinking about this stuff, my mom was in her 30s) It hasn't happened for me yet, but maybe once I hit 30...

Thursday, March 23, 2006

The Perch

I play at a sandwich shop in Plano called Potbelly. I play up on what I like to the call "the perch". I climb up a little ladder and I sing up there for a couple of hours a few days a week during lunch.
Since I'm up away from the people, I have very little interaction with anyone during my two hours of singing. But I watch...
You can tell so much about people and how they probably live their lives by watching them from that perch!
Almost every day there is a couple that I would guess is in their 60's that come in. This is their ritual:
He drops her off at the door and she grabs a table while he first parks, and then comes in and waits in line to get their sandwiches. They always read a USA today...and she always works the crossword. They stay about 45 minutes and then they walk out, holding hands. But before they leave, they always make a point of saying "hi" to me and giving me a wave, or occasionally the man gives me a thumbs (way) up. This is BIG STUFF in my book. Most people don't acknowledge me at all. These people are friendly: friendly to me, sweet to each other, and they're giving out smiles left and right to people around them. Especially the man. The woman is the quiet one, I think.
So today I walked by their table after I finished my set and I said hello to them. He gave me a very friendly "Well hello there!!!" Then I asked him, "Are you always in a good mood?"
And here is what he said:
"Well, yeah!!! Look at who I get to spend all of my days with!" (as he, of course, points to his wife) He goes on to tell me that they laugh all day long. They've known each other since they were 15, and they've been married for 43 years. He said she's, "the easiest person in the world to get along with". I asked her if he was also so easy to live with and she said yes!
None of this shocked me, although I know how rare this kind of thing is. My view from the perch told me all of this, more or less, long before we happened to have this conversation today.
I love my gig at Potbelly. I love that perch! And I love watching...

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Love/Hate

I've always had a page on my website where I write about movies, book, and cds I've checked out recently. I use to call it "recommendations", then I switched it to "reviews" and it will soon be changing to "love/hate" and here is why:

I find huge value and interest in things I love- That's obvious, right? I don't know if this is normal human behavior, although I think it is, but I am also fascinated by things I hate. I'm not, however, so interested in mediocrity. Here's a simple example: If Ashlee Simpson were going to be singing on Jay Leno I'd be sure to watch it. It might possibly even be the highlight of my day. I can't stand her and therefore, I love to listen to her and watch her for that very reason! On the other hand, if Norah Jones was going to be on, I might not even bother to watch it. NOTHING against Norah, it's just that I don't LOVE her and I certainly don't hate her, so I'm not all that interested.

Here's another example. The show on TV that I was glued to last night... BLOW OUT. Jonathon of JONATHON SALON must be one of the most irritating bastards out there. I can't stand him, so I LOVE watching HIM!!! I find myself talking back to my television set in disgust. I find the show riveting because it is so stupid. I even went to the BRAVO website just to read more about him and his sick little show. He even has a blog! Yay, we've got that in common. Besides the abrasiveness of his personality he also allows the camera's to show his softer side. He let's the camera inside his private therapy sessions where he often cries. AWWWWW!!!! He's sensitive too!

The 3rd season has just begun. It's on BRAVO on Tuesday nights. I highly recommend it.

So, what do you love to hate?

Love/Hate

I've always had a page on my website where I write about movies, book, and cds I've checked out recently- I use to call it "recommendations", then I switched it to "reviews" and it will soon be changing to "love/hate" and here is why!

I find huge value and intersest in things I love- That's obvious, right? I don't know if this is normal human before, altho I think it is, but I am also fascinated by things I hate. I'm not so interested in mediocrity. Here's a simple example: If Ashlee Simpson were going to be singing on Jay Leno I'd be sure to watch it. It might possibly even be the highlight of my day. I can't stand her and I love to listen to her and watch her for that very reason! On the other hand, if Norah Jones was going to be on, I might not even bother to watch it. NOTHING against Norah, it's just that I don't LOVE her and I certainly don't hate her, so I'm not all tat interested.

So, the show on TV that I was glued to last night... BLOW OUT. Jonathon of JONATHON SALON must be one of the most irritating bastards out there. I can't stand him, so I LOVE HIM!!! I find myself talking back to my television set in disgust. I find the show riviting because it is so stupid. I even went to the BRAVO website just to read more about him and his sick little show. He even has a blog! Yay, we've got that in common! Besides the abrasiveness of his personality he also allows the camera's to show his softer side. He let's the camera inside his private therapy sessions where he often cries. AWWWWW!!!! He's sensitive too!

The 3rd season has just begun. It's on BRAVO on Tuesday nights. I highly recommend it.

So, what do you love to hate?

Monday, March 20, 2006

Numero Uno

Here it is: My first blog! It feels like so much pressure to come up with something fascinating for my first-ever-blog entry. However, I am a person who avoids big pressure, and I don't want to avoid my blog, so, this is it- I'm just going to ease into it slowly and try to write here on a semi-regular basis. Fascinating, huh?!



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